does it has to be this way? cause i CANT cope

come one dude

get your act right

we all have our own problem

sure thing, you got yours

and while mine may not be as BIG as yours

................

please please please please please please

do NOT be cross with me 

the WHOLE fucking time

cause i dont know if i can cope with it

or i'll just cross myself out of your life

........

........

........

and to end this stressful post with a lighter note,

i will put a cute shanaynay picture

there.

first crush

     "I can't believe that you're still head over heels for him after two frigging years, Risa. How much longer do you plan to waste your youth?" ZAPP!! Rina's words could really break my heart if I didn't know her that well. But, she's right. Even I didn't understand myself sometimes. What's so special about Daniel Tan that made me became so infatuated with him? Sure, he's good looking, but there's aplenty of beautiful boys in our school; they literally flooded the place in daily basis. He's good in sports, tennis especially; but before I met him, I was never really into those people. He's so out of my league, I got it; but I was trapped in my own feelings. I held Rina's hands and shook my head. 

    

     "Please... Just let me be..." God, I must sound so pathetic. I'm sorry Rina, I may be wasting my time playing with my dreams, but this is what I wanted.

it's raining now

and i love rain. sejuk, menenangkan dan sangat sesuai untuk menidurkan diri :D and it's also romantic. i've seen many pictures of people kissing in midst of raindrops, and to imagine that when cold is surrounding you, there still someone beside you giving warmth... it's just seems so touching. 

i dont remember much, but Comsie had this rain theme in his stories a while ago. all i can remember is the main character went cycling to the boyfriends house in midst of rain, and he was distracted by this one boy. i love that little boy. in these stories he's like a little cupid who foreshadowed that good things were waiting in the future. i love him enough to still remember that he's a redhead.

as i mentioned before, rain to me is about lying, being on the bed under the comforter and the plushies, dreaming away about everything until slowly i drifted to nothingness. 

and i love when rain falls when i'm in the car with Mr. R. i couldn't see anybody else through the window. it's like the only thing existed then are just me and him.

cheerio.

teacher's day

     "Um... are you sure about this? I mean... if you're busy or something..." Aryssa stuttered as she kept on walking with Hazry by her side. They were taking slow strides, because after all it's Teacher's day and every human being present at school was too busy amusing themselves. No one would bug them, and they took comfort in that. 

     

     "What's the place again?" Hazry flashed a look at her, which promptly made her cheeks reddened yet again.

     

     "The new deli. Pyon Cafe? I heard the crepe there is good...."

     

     "I'd like to try flan. Do they sell that thing?" Aryssa smiled. His positive response was hard to come by in such girlish things as sweets.

     

     "Un! I saw it in the flyer.... I... I'll make it my treat if you..."

    

     " NO. Let me. It's our first date after all." He nonchalantly said, as his right hand quickly found a way to pat the girls head gently. Such a childlike girl; how'd he be so lucky to have his dark, lonely path crossed with this angel?

i did

ignorance hurts

"Why won't he like you? You're confident, beautiful, smart.... Hell, if I'm a guy, I'd definitely ask you out," Lisa mumbled in midst of my sobs. She carried on bitching about Hazri, that one guy who had been my happy charm, until he crushed my heart that very day. I definitely won't forgot how happy he was, chattering with Ain, our fellow classmate whom I knew had her eyes set on Hazri since forever. 

After all the signals and hints I've quietly directed at him. If only he understands. If only...