hit me like a mothertrucking punch

yesterday was a bad

i just couldn't stop

thinking

wondering

all the "what if's" and "should have's" are killing me

i feel like giving up


what if i let it all go?

what if all these are not meant to be?

what if it's all in my fucking head?

what if i'm torturing myself with what will never be?


but it's too late, ain't it?

my wings already clipped

it would take years

before i can even contemplate

the possibility of 

getting off the ground for the first time;

the sweet fear of unknowing



still,

a possibility

is,

a possibility